While I was reviewing my tutee in the subject, GMRC (Good Moral and Right Conduct), I saw this article entitled, “Rules of Being Human”. I suddenly had a wake-up call about my attitude towards how I view life. I told myself, “These rules are reminders for me and for the people who think like me.” Therefore, I decided to feature the article here in my blog.
As I researched more about the article, I found out that it was from a book written by Cherie Carter-Scott, Ph.D. entitled, “If Life is a Game, These are The Rules: Ten Rules of a Fulfilling Life”.
Dr. Carter-Scoot is an author known to write about behavioral and self-development books. *This tickled my interest about her books. I hope I would be able to read them soon.*
As I cite each of the rule, I will be sharing my own thoughts and experiences so that you can relate with the article, too. 🙂
1. You will receive a body.
“You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for the entire period of this time.”
I am insecure with women who have model-like and sexy bodies. I have a short height, massive thighs, and slightly big arms. I am an aspiring model which is why I have this insecurity. Also, here in the Philippines, it’s a big deal being ‘perfect’. Each flaw you have will be crassly addressed to you — “Ang taba mo!”, “Huwag kang mag-shorts! Ang laki laki ng hita mo e!”, “Dati sexy ka, anong nangyari ngayon?”, “Hindi pwede mag-model ang matataba!”
But, you know what? I usually just ignore them. I just focus on developing my self-confidence, though of course, insecurities are instilled in my ego. However, I see to it that instead of hating myself everyday, I empower my confidence in different ways such as applying my favorite makeup and wearing fashionable clothes.
I’m sure you have your own ways on how to make yourself feel more confident. Do them instead of comparing yourself with others.
2. You will learn lessons.
“You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called life. Each day in this school, you will have an opportunity to learn lessons. You may like the lessons or think them as irrelevant and stupid.”
We will commit mistakes and do the most foolish things in life. It’s normal! Yes, we will regret things in the end, but we will surely learn from them. I, myself, has committed mistakes I regret even up to now. Some of them really affected my life negatively; however, I learned a lot from those faults, and I am assaying not to repeat them so that I would not feel the same pain again.
One example was when I trusted a person who happened to be very close to our family. After years of being a family friend, we never thought that he would do a very grievous action against me. Since then, I never gave full trust to anyone — not even to the people closest to me and to my family.
3. There are no mistakes, only lessons.
“Growth is a process of trial and error; an experimentation. The failed ‘experiment’ are as much a part of the experiment process as the experiment ultimately works.”
For every mistake, there’s a lesson learned. At my age, I have acquired different lessons in life related to love, family, attitude, teaching, marriage, and friendship.
Being in several relationships, I had done things that had hurt my partner — that was I, being a dishonest girlfriend. It turned out, dishonesty destroyed years of our relationship. I had learned from that mistake, and now that I am married, I avert myself from being a dishonest wife to my better half. Now, I enjoy the trust he gives me as I relish the trust I give to my husband. ❤
4. A lesson is repeated until learned.
“A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can then go on to the next lesson.”
Familiar with this? — “Bakit paulit-ulit na lang ako nasasaktan?!”
One answer to that question: it is because you repeat the same mistake!
In connection to my previous example about love, I had been broken tons of times! It is because I let guys hurt me over and over again. I kept on giving them my full trust, letting them take advantage of me, and allowing them to tear me apart.
If you keep on repeating your mistakes, you will feel the same pain in different ways. Nonetheless, it is how we, human beings, learn from our faults. Remember, with every mistake, there is an equivalent lesson.
5. Learning the lessons does not end.
“There is no part of life that does not contain its lessons. As long as you are alive, there are lessons to be learned.”
Let’s accept the fact that lessons in life are infinite; we will be facing different lessons until we die.
This is the reason why the best people to ask for advice are the veterans and our parents. They have faced various ups and downs already. I often ask myself, “Why would the challenges in my life never stop!”. There are times I get tired of all the obstacles I am going through. For those people who know my life story, they witnessed the hellish things I have been experiencing. It is like I just want my life to pause for a moment, and take a break. However, with these lessons, it turned me into a better person. It gave me maturity with the way how I think and act. These lessons are actually BLESSINGS. 🙂
6. THERE is NO better than HERE.
“When your THERE has become a HERE, you will simply obtain another THERE that will again look better than here. “
We often neglect the matters we have in the present. We always want to have whatever we see from others — not realizing that we already have great things in our hands.
I admit — I am like this most of the time. I always compare the things I see ‘there’ with the things I have ‘here’. I usually fail to see the blessings given to me by God.
One example is my career. I feel pity for myself because I believe that my career is being left behind. I get insecure when I see social media posts of my friends about their ‘MA’ lives. Although I know that I became impulsive with my past decisions, I still feel downhearted because this plan of mine has been delayed for 2 years. Then, here comes the people who keep on encouraging me to pursue my goals in life — that being a mom at 21 is never a hindrance to make my dreams come true, hence, it is a great motivation. So, I am now slowly accomplishing what are needed for me to go on to this next chapter of my life.
7. Others are merely mirrors of you.
“You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects something you love or hate about yourself.”
I just realized that we base our standards on what we love or hate about ourselves. Like in choosing a partner — if you know that you are an extrovert, then you will definitely enjoy a partner who is as sociable as you are; if you hate yourself for being fat, then you will look for a partner who is physically fit.
In my case, since I hate the fact that I am emotionally weak, I tend to love and be with those people who are emotionally weak as well. It is because I understand what they are going through. I can definitely relate to most of their experiences in life, and how they handle them.
8. What you make of your life is up to you.
“You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours.”
Lately, I have read a post from a former student of mine that says, “There is no such thing as a bad child; only bad parenting.”
That may be partly true; HOWEVER, whatever it is that is happening to your life and its outcome, is BECAUSE OF YOU. Stop blaming parents, or others for what you have become. WE MOLD OUR FUTURES. WE MOLD OURSELVES.
I did not grow up with a mother beside me. It was my father who took care of me and my brother all throughout. I could have chosen to become a rebel — to drown myself in vices, to fool around with my studies, to do crimes; but still, I did not. I’m not saying that I am a perfect daughter — what I mean is that I could have chosen the damaged path, but no. Instead, I accepted my fate and stood up with my own two feet with my family’s guidance. I graduated college as a full scholar, and I did not give my dad too much vexation. Yes, I made a lot of mistakes as a teenager, but I can proudly say that it never came to a point that my family would detest me for who I am and for what I have become now.
9. Your answers lie inside of you.
“The answers to life’s questions lie inside you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust.”
Most of the times, we do not know the answers to our questions about what’s going on in our lives. Then, one day, we would experience something — we would suddenly realize that whatever happened to us before has its reason — it’s God’s will.
Before I met my husband, I kept on asking myself why my current relationship that time was deteriorating. It turned out that the answers to my question before were: it was because of my immature attitude, and it was God’s plan to make me fall in love with a more deserving man. If it weren’t for those failures I had experienced in my love life, I wouldn’t have been a better mate to my husband today.
10. You will forget these at birth.
“You can remember it if you want by unravelling the double helix of inner knowing.”
Of course, we will forget these ‘rules’. With all the intense battles we face in life, we unintentionally forget what we learn in life. However, when we are feeling down, we can always look up to this and remember that WE ARE HUMAN BEINGS — we are not perfect, we prospect for better things in life, we make mistakes.
These ‘rules’ are not commandments; these are simply ‘universal truths’ that apply to all of us whatever state of life we are in.
Let’s live our lives to the fullest! We should enjoy all the blessings that God has given us!
Live. Learn. Love. ❤
Life is the best blessing we could ever have. Just remember:
“Being a human is given, but HUMANITY is a choice”.
Until the next post! Thank you for dropping by! ❤
Carlos, M. L. G. (2012). Me and others. In M. Sutania (Ed.), True Filipino: Thought, in word and in deed (2nd ed., pp. 129-131). Quezon City: FNB Educational, Inc.